6ml

I am so sorry for the late post. It's been 2 weeks of busy.  We had to skip last week because Claire had a little sinus infection going on.  They will not up her dose if she is the slightest bit sick.  She is more likely to have a reaction with any type of illness.  So we went Tuesday.

Tuesday I believe will be our new day of choice, Claire gets 3 hours of school, I can cram in 4 hours of work and we make it home at bedtime and ready for Wednesday.  It's exhausting, but it doesn't take over an entire day of school/work like Fridays do.  Anyway, we  headed off to Dallas Tuesday for her first increase in 2 weeks. My sister Bethany was with us, Adam had bids to get out.  Bethany was a huge help with Claire, and keeping me awake for the day.  We get to Medical City, totally uneventful.  No wrong turns, one way streets, tickets, nothing!  I was super proud.  I'm the wife that's not allowed out after dark because Adam is fairly positive I would get lost. 

While we are there we see a friend we made from our LONG day, Dezi.  He's darling.  I like the mom, she's super sweet and easy to talk to.  We made a date for next Tuesday, same time, same place.  The drs bumped Claire up to 6ml @ 2.5mg concentrate.  wahoo!  Should be about 4 more liquid dose increases and them we are to the capsules that you empty into food.  Not so much looking forward to that!

You know, as ecstatic as I am to have my Claire safe from peanuts in just a few short months, it is a really odd feeling.  I've been a peanut allergy mom for 5 years, I don't remember parenting when our lives didn't revolve around this.  Of course we will be Epi-Pen carriers for the rest of her life, but the daily/minute to minute fear will be gone.  It's almost like losing your identity.  All I know is protecting her.  Obviously I protect my son in the normal "mama" way.  But with Claire it is painfully different.  She and I share a different relationship, it's almost a life line.  I have to admit, it's a life line that goes both ways.  Before her I didn't know what being a true mama was.  Cole was so easy.  Slept all night at 6 weeks, and in a big boy bed at 2.  Potty trained at 3, ate solid food from the get go.  He was like a pretend baby.  God knew I couldn't handle a challenge at 23.  I was doggy paddling and I needed a baby that I could love and not need to do much else.  Claire came as a challenge from day one, we have learned and grown together.  Adam and Cole have been our constant balance.  This will be a huge change for them too.  I will have to shift my mothering I think.  It will be more freeing for sure, but terrifying to say the least.  It would be nice to assume this is a completely normal feeling, but I'm really doubting others feel this way. 

On a lighter note, Claire tried jumping on a soccer ball Sunday afternoon and landed on her wrist.  Green stick fracture on her left arm.  She will only wear the cast/splint for 2 weeks.  That child has whined about her arm itching every other breath.  Thank God it's only 2 weeks.  A friend of mine (Crystal)'s daughter broke both bones in her arm yesterday.  That baby will be in a cast for a while.  Poor thing.  The best part was tonight at Jujitsu Cole had a kid crunch down on his finger.  AWESOME.  Adam called, I picked him up and he cried, and cried and cried.  Ok, do I go home and get him calmed down?  Do I send him to school tomorrow telling him he's fine and suck it up?  It's his right ring finger, which is a pretty important finger for writing.  So, off to Velocity for an x-ray.  I know there's not much to do for a broken finger, but a splint or something to protect it maybe.  When the dr came in and looked at Cole's tear stained face and then over to me holding Claire with a cast on her arm - all she could do was laugh.  I assured her that calling Child Protective Services was completely not needed.  But it sure does look suspicious - 2 casts in 5 days.  Luckily it's not a broken bone, just a deep bruise.  

I'm not 100% sure what I'm supposed to write about on here, but I found myself today wanting to type.  I guess get everything swimming in my head out in the open. Please note that I do not always proof read every word I type, so go easy on the grammar.  And, I am not a writer, by any stretch of the imagination.  If it sounds like babbling, it's because that's how it comes out - sorry.